| Wrote 07/01/2007
Death is a frivolous matter is it not? Death and life are one in the same, just as the passing of days. Death is something that we all fear, yet sometimes we long for it... why? It can be tradgic, or it can be beautiful.... shocking or suspected... slow or in haste... painfull or releaving... Why do we cry when a ficticious character in a movie dies, but can go without a drop when it's a loved one. Death effects people differently, wether it be sending you into a mourn, a fit of rage, or even a sense of responsibility. Whenever I have experianced death, it has been different everytime;
-When my dad died, I remember the night, but not much after. I was told I went crazy at the funeral. I have no recoglection of it at all, Before hand even, all my memories are fragments, like reflections of a broken mirror, you see the picture, just not the whole thing.
-When we had to put my dog down I cried some, it took all I had to hold back the tears. I had had her for all I could remember until I was eighteen, I knew it was for the best, it's just hard saying goodbye as she fell asleep in my arms.
-When my grandma died I shed no tears, perhaps it was becuase of the cancer, and how I watched it eat away at her life force everyday, perhaps it was because I had to stay strong for my mom, or I was never as close to her. I just found out tonight that my Grandma on my mom's side passed away tonight. There was no bloodline but it's still family. I've never really been that close to that side of the family just because they live so far away, I've always been closer to my father's side. She wasn't in the best of health and had gone in for surgery and didn't make it out. I feel for my grandpa, and my mom who is torn up as well. My mom and Troy are cutting their vacation short and my mom is flying to Pennslyvania to see him and her sisters. Like my grandpa she was extremely caring person who tried to make others happy. As I look up to the full moon above I am earned a sense of calm. A full moon has always relaxed me and brought a balance to my thoughts. Perhaps how it's glow luminates the entire area making everything visible with a soft light. Though the pain of others is shown, it will diminish with time. Hopefully that time will arive sooner than later. All I can do is to support the ones I care for, it seems to be the one thing I'm good at. I try and help others, because it's easier than helping myself. I bid you all adué,
May the gold in your life pay for the journey across the Styx. |
